You are not who people think you are.
You are who you think people think you are."
I quote a man, whom name I can't recall.
But I do recall sitting in that Rock Bar. I came there alone, to listen to music, and have a couple of drinks. Meeting new people was just a nice added bonus to the package. And of all the "unusually" dressed people in the bar, there was one guy who "didn't fit in". He was dressed casually, and projected over-confidence, in a way. Not the type of a man on cocaine, but in a way that hides shyness... In a way I know best.
He was there with two friends, a guy and a girl, they were clearly a couple. Maybe he came with them just spontaneously,to drink a beer and have a chat, but he wasn't there for the loud music. He was new to Rock Bars. He was so nervous, so afraid of this new environment. Afraid of these "men in black", who as far as he knows from movies and media, are violent and aggressive. But all that happened inside. From the outside, he was big, strong, and very loud.
His behavior was funny, and silly in a way. I couldn't take my eyes of that phenomenon. After, a few quick glances, I understood that his fear and defence mechanism, tells him that I'm hostile, and he should deal with my hostility. Let's just say that I wasn't surprised when he stood up from his chair, with his trusty pint of beer in hand, walked around the bar, and asked me if I have a problem with him. which, of course, I didn't. I looked him in the eyes, gave him a warm smile, and answered: "No, not at all. Cheers!"
Short after our pints clashed in a friendly sound, he returned to his sit, somewhat relieved and confused at the same time. Of course, I wouldn't know that, if I Haven't kept staring at the poor guy. Which led to the next situation taking place about 15 minutes afterwards:
He stands up again, with his 60cc whisky/bourbon +Ice in hand, and this time, he walks to me with a slightly bent back, and shy puppy eyes, and asks me if I will be offended if he asked me a personal question. I answered that I have nothing to hide, and he can ask whatever he wants. And he asks - 'Are you buy any chance attracted to men?', and I answered - 'Not that I know of it. Cheers again!'.
He smiled, and asked me to forgive his rudeness, which I stated, was none of, and he walked away.
Two times, in a span of an hour, for a strange man, I was who I imagined he thought I am. And that is amazing!
It's a fact that our brain can barely process any information, while seeing another man's face. Our brain is trying to figure out what does this man in-front of us feels, thinks, experience. You are lucky if that man is not looking at you back. Caus' if he does, he is probably doing the same to you. And this is where it get's tricky. Imagine that.
Now imagine, all the people you see (with or without mutual interaction), and furthermore, all those people who see you.
Every each and one of us, is living in a small world of personal guesses and assumptions. Every one of us is living in a different world. And if you really think about it, it's the mystery and uncertainty in all, that makes our lives, that makes us so amazing.
You don't have to imagine, you already do.
